Inside-Out Hospitality

If you have ever had a rough day and a warm hug or pat on the back brought you some relief, then you have an idea about how the power of touch (or feel) can be a powerful tool in hospitality. We have been on an amazing series on the 6 senses of hospitality. To date, we have examined the power of sound and sight. Today, we will talk about the sense of touch. This touch can either be physical, material, or even emotional.

Warm Welcome

I personally prefer churches where people rush to greet newcomers with a handshake (or hug) instead of acknowledging distant smiles. Worse, after service, everyone returns to their circle of friends, and the new timer is left standing in a corner (sometimes abandoned by the person who brought them there!).

“Greet one another with a holy kiss.” — Romans 16:16a, NIV

Some people are touchier than others, and if they are not comfortable with touch, they may find it offensive. When done correctly, touch can lead to positive outcomes, but it can also be a source of offence if done incorrectly. Touch must be appropriate and respectful.

Things to Watch Out For

“Be careful to live properly among your unbelieving neighbors. Then even if they accuse you of doing wrong, they will see your honorable behavior, and they will give honor to God…” — 1 Peter 2:12, NLT

• Cultural: e.g. In most African cultures, it is considered rude to be the one to extend your hand to greet an elderly person. You must wait for them to do so (many knocks on my head serve as a reminder to date).
• Gender differences: Avoid prolonged hugs with people of the opposite sex, as some may receive mixed signals (even to onlookers).
• Children: Teach your children about safe touch and set boundaries on who can touch, hug, or carry them at home, at school, or even in the church.
• When you (or a guest) are ill, you don’t want to transmit germs to your guests. You can do an elbow bump or a wave and explain why (to avoid sending the wrong message).

What Can You Do?

Where appropriate:

• Extend a handshake or hug to welcome those around you (e.g., the person sitting beside you in class, at church, or who comes to your house).
• If you are afraid of germs, use a hand sanitiser (but not immediately after, as it may send the wrong message).
• When in doubt, ask, ‘Would you like a hug?’ if you really feel someone needs one.
• Hold hands when praying with or for someone.
• Personally serve your guests or offer a personalised gift.

Cozy Home

I used to have this blanket, and I loved it so much. I used it from Form 1 to 7, and even into my university years. The only problem with that blanket was that it was no longer soft to the touch due to wear and tear, which we call ‘chuku chuku’ (scratchy). Others had difficulty sleeping with the blanket. So what is comfy for you may not be comfy for others.

“My people will live in peaceful dwelling places, in secure homes, in undisturbed places of rest.” — Isaiah 32:18, NIV

Here’s how you can upgrade your home to hotel standard by appealing to the sense of touch:

• Use soft, smooth fabrics for your bedsheets, blankets, towels, pillows, and soft rugs around the house (it feels good to wake up from the bed and have your feet on a soft rug on the floor).
• Invest in durable quality to avoid frequent purchases.
• Comfortable bed (and mattress) or a comfy chair with a good view
• Make sure the items above and your home are clean (a good sight for sore eyes and a good overall feeling).
• If you want them to remove their shoes (as some hosts prefer), offer them cosy slippers or other alternatives.
• Regulate the temperature at home. If it is too warm, open the windows, get a fan or AC, etc. If it is too cold, offer tea, a blanket and a heater if possible.

Emotional or Spiritual Touch

As we already know, Inside-out hospitality goes beyond eating and drinking; it touches the spirit and soul of your guest, bringing in God’s presence.

“As one whom his mother comforts, so I will comfort you; and you shall be comforted in Jerusalem.” — Isaiah 66:13, ESV

Also,

“Carry each other’s burdens, and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ.” — Galatians 6:2, NIV

• Create a safe space in your home where people can be comfortable sharing their struggles. This can mean avoiding distractions such as TV and phones and giving your guests your undivided attention.
• When they share, a gentle touch, such as a pat on the back, an arm around the shoulder, or a hug, can be very reassuring. This doesn’t only work on kids; it also works on adults.
• Pray with and for them (where appropriate, lay hands on them).
• We already discussed how our words can make someone feel welcome, touching the hearts of our guests.

I have a friend who almost always knows how to elicit from people what is bothering them. I noticed that he will go beyond asking if you are ok. Still, he will find a way to either visit, invite you over, or just walk to you, hold your hand, put an arm around you, look into your eyes, and ask again… ‘Are you ok?’ and then you just realise how they start pouring it all out, and the healing process begins!

Inside-Out Takeaway

Leveraging the sense of touch or feelings can improve our hospitality to our guests, to the glory of God. You can do so through a personal physical touch, an emotional touch or investing in soft fabrics in your home. Take note of what is appropriate and respectful in every setting.

Inside-Out Question

Have you had an experience in which someone’s touch made you feel welcome? Or the opposite? Please share in the comment section.

Did you enjoy this post? Please share, like and comment so it can bless others. Subscribe to our blog so you do not miss out on future posts.

You can find part 2 of this post here

Here’s to hosting from the inside out!